Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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