The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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