I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
