Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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