All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Randomize
