yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
if only i could text you this smell
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
