Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
