Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?

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(778): View more from British Columbia

some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A

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(347): View more from New York

I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning

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(314): View more from Missouri

I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you

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(704): View more from North Carolina

She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..

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(519): View more from Ontario

I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id

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(949): View more from California

You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it

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