were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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