He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
