He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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