So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
