He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
It's Friday. Sex?
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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