my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I'm at about main and main street
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
