So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
