I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
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