Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
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