i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
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