The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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