hell yes lets make some ravioli
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
