It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
tell me about the eggs
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
