when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
