he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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