You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize