My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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