Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
