Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i was born a porn star she said
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
