The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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