So drunk its hurt
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
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