So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
