I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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