i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
my poor anus
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
