Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
