I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize