i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
