I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize