I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
