I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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