He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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