Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Randomize
