They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
