That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
