just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize