I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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