the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Randomize
