I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
this hospital has no fireball
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize