I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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