Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
