I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
