I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
